Joy & Pain

Updated: Oct 14, 2020

THANK YOU for reading and commenting and emailing and engaging! I LOVE IT and I read every response! My goal is to keep each post to about a minute (maybe 2) of read time--something we can all spare--and a literary challenge that excites the nerd in me! So without further ado, today's minute.

Stop stifling Black women's joy of healing!

Some criticize the expression of my acceptance of my trauma and healing. When white folx critique, it seems to come from an unintentional, self centered place where they believe there's some responsibility they need to take, and not feeling ready to do so, they become defensive or feel guilty for having learned my truth. They would rather run back to the "fun" and culturally appropriated versions of Blackness they are more comfortable with. When my own people criticize, it often comes with the caveat, "white people don't need to always hear about our trauma,."

Well, you know that quote, "I am my ancestors' wildest dreams"? I think I am the manifestation of their healing too. I mean, my ancestors were brutally raped and abused, expected to "care" for their abusers and their children, then raised their own abused children when they were lucky enough to keep them. This and more without backtalk. Without therapy. Without time off for self-care. Without time off period. I can imagine the agony shut up in their bones. And, I believe it pours out today through me and my story.

So when I write out my pain, speak it, sing it, dance it, shout is to release and create more and more room for healing and joy. The expression of my pain, that process IS a component of my joy. The more I express, the better I feel.

So try and HEAR our stories from who we are. Think first of challenging the white gaze. Think more of appreciating the joy in the process of Black girl healing!

I honestly worry more about the white gaze on my JOY because anytime we have it white supremacy culture tries to steal or kill it.


Recent Posts

See All